It is done

Well we are over. I don’t recall a person breaking up with me…Well like my best friend told me (boohoo) and he is right. I feel sad? Not sure why I feel sad, I even asked him if we could try again. He was ruthless, I guess I deserve it.

I just got off the phone with him and I told him some not so nice things. I told him Fuck you and have a good life. Then I texted him apologizing for being so mean….Oh well, I can let it go now. He said that the way I hung up said it all. I told him, he saying we were done said it all. Oh well.

A sober relationship and a sober break-up, cool.

What did I learn, never date someone so damn young who does not know how to be with a woman and NEVER EVER show weakness. I think because I let him into my world (on a massive scale) I got attached… WOW. I need to focus on God…I put too much into a relationship that was bound to fail anyway.

He really is an awesome person and I do feel badly about what I said, ok no I don’t feel bad. You know what came to mind after I hung up??? Fuck that felt good and FUCK I am going to have to inventory this and I hope it does not turn out to be an amends. I said I was sorry through text but the sad thing is that I said other things with it. I was a bitch and I was too damn much drama.

Word of advice to future me……………..Don’t go so fucking fast and most importantly don’t open the door to a man about my life for a very long time…

It was fun sometimes while it lasted.

I love the comment he made this is not fun anymore. Well shit, at your age I don’t think any relationship would be fun unless a woman shuts the fuck up and puts up with shit.  He did put up with my shit too. Too much shit for such a short relationship. The great thing is I can move on….In fact I have. I get to see an old friend this Sunday that I have always loved. The problem is that he drinks but he is coming in from out-of-town so it will be nice to get a bear hug!!! We talk quite a few times a week and have for years (with the exception of when I was married) so it will be nice to be near a man who is a man and knows me, he is great.

I am looking forward to a great weekend. No drama on my part and a free sence of peace of being in a relationship I got so much slack for it drove me crazy. I think the shit I got for it was what made me even more insecure. What a pussy I was.

Any who, I have the house to myself tonight. It will be nice to work on crafts or something like that and enjoy my alone time!

This entry was posted in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s