I feel so sad. Like my best friend told me, I have to let this go. I, again, made a fool of myself today. I lost a friend in my x…and at this point I am totally ok with it. I saw him ride today, it was cool but he was being kind of a dick. I told him last night that I didn’t want to go see him ride because I still have feelings for him. He blew it off and I, like an idiot, I went and exactly what I thought would happen happened. As I look at him and our relationship I can easily tell myself that it was pretty pathetic…especially for pinning over a guythat is 8 years younger than me. He has no idea about what life is about. I think my life, my experiences…..shit going on…He can’t relate to at all.
My mistake again. And I just actted like a fucking asshole. Oh well.
I was a bitch to him again. I said some stupid shit to him and called him a goddamn pussy. The scary thing is I think I might be pregnant, what the fuck would I do???????????
I pray that I’m late because of the stress. It’s happened before.
We can’t be friends. At this point I know he does not want to be my friend and quite frankly I want nothing to do with him. I am going to completely let this go. Like my best friend told me, I will look back at this and laugh..soon.
Oh and today is 6 months for me.