It’s amazing how others have experienced similar situations or understand my feelings and know what I am going through…we all walk the same path in one way or another, is it not to pass on to the other side?
I work tonight, first time I picked up an extra shift since my dad died. I have been finding ways t be out of the house since my little sister is home form college for Christmas. She is 19-years-old and gets on my nerves. I am in my own world too to her defense. We are all to some level. Some watch the ground when they walk, some look at themselves in the reflection of the window and some just stare into space and let lost. I try to watch but I find I fade when I watch and get lost in space. My little sister has a lot going on and is dealing with our fathers death in her own way…..I try to just let her be. So, I picked up an extra shift tonight which will get me out of the house for a few hours.
I am going to stay with a little old lady that is 93. It seems she is spending the rest of her days in a rehab facility/nursing home. The facility is the same place my father was in shortly before he died. I stayed with the little old lady once before when my father was staying there and introduced them…I wonder if I should mention it to her? I stopped talking about my father having just passed, not much of my conversations have to do with him anymore. Perhaps I shouldn’t mention my father as start new with her this evening, she may not remember me being there; it was probably 3 months ago. This is also a good first step for me in the healing process…I am getting stronger and slowly coming out of my shell…I’m not feeling sad all the time anymore!
I have also been working on some multimedia art projects……