It’s been a good day. I rested my mind. I didn’t get much done but I am always going, so it’s okay. I needed a mental day, so I took it.

I want to thank you, those of  you who read my blog and leave me beautiful comments that give me strength. I go through periods of writing, like I do with producing art. The fall and winder are my bad RA times, so I focus on my fine arts. When the weather is nice and I have more movement, I like to go to a bookstore and read, blog and be around people. I like the feeling of having people around even though I don’t know them. Nothing makes me more happy than to overhear a conversation where laughter is involved. I still paint and draw but I take advantage of the weather and the youthfulness of my joints.

I have stayed away from my house for the last few weeks. I’ve spent a few nights with my friend, she is an amazing support for me. She fills my cup when it feels empty. She has lived a lot of life…it’s not very often that I meet people who have been through more than I have…it’s nice.

I showed up at her house last night late. We talked and she let me cry. I was overwhelmed with feelings from the weekend so I threw myself into her arms and she held me, like a mother. She has become many things for me but her greatest quality is friend. I don’t have many pillars in my life, she is one. I know that life is silly and in time we may drift apart but just for today, she is here and I am for her. She respects me and trusts my judgment. She struggles with bipolar and knows her illness well. I am proud of the woman she is and proud to call her my friend. I asked her last night what she thought about me and my emotional state; she knows me well. She told me I have major PTSD but my emotional strength and knowledge of what I need for myself to be balanced is right on….and I agree.

I am thankful I have been able to stay sober and strong. I have weak days but they don’t take me out like they did when I drank and was on meds.

It feels so good to write and connect with those who understand. Thank you for reading friends.

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6 Responses to

  1. I’m so glad you had a ‘real live’ person when you needed a hug and some comfort. While we may be friends over the web and we really do care..there is no substitute for that loving arm around your shoulder… and it’s so good she validated what you believe… that you are strong and see things accurately…. take care.. guess it’s back to work tomorrow… eh? Diane

  2. bpnana says:

    I’m so glad your post was waiting in my email. Today’s been a tough day, coming off oral steroids (which I had to take as a kid for 4 yrs. for asthma.), and your lovely post is helping me to wind down. Thanks for being here! Love to You! P.S. How lucky you are to have such a great friend!

  3. Hawkruh says:

    Simply said, I’m jealous of your friendship. But then again, I’ve always been too afraid of rejection to ask a friend to hold me. Maybe I need to take a chance. I really could use that kind of holding. Unfortunately, my husband has difficulty with such nurturing, although I know he loves me. I really want to be held.

    I’m glad you took the time you need. It’s often hard to do.

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