It’s been a good day. I rested my mind. I didn’t get much done but I am always going, so it’s okay. I needed a mental day, so I took it.
I want to thank you, those of you who read my blog and leave me beautiful comments that give me strength. I go through periods of writing, like I do with producing art. The fall and winder are my bad RA times, so I focus on my fine arts. When the weather is nice and I have more movement, I like to go to a bookstore and read, blog and be around people. I like the feeling of having people around even though I don’t know them. Nothing makes me more happy than to overhear a conversation where laughter is involved. I still paint and draw but I take advantage of the weather and the youthfulness of my joints.
I have stayed away from my house for the last few weeks. I’ve spent a few nights with my friend, she is an amazing support for me. She fills my cup when it feels empty. She has lived a lot of life…it’s not very often that I meet people who have been through more than I have…it’s nice.
I showed up at her house last night late. We talked and she let me cry. I was overwhelmed with feelings from the weekend so I threw myself into her arms and she held me, like a mother. She has become many things for me but her greatest quality is friend. I don’t have many pillars in my life, she is one. I know that life is silly and in time we may drift apart but just for today, she is here and I am for her. She respects me and trusts my judgment. She struggles with bipolar and knows her illness well. I am proud of the woman she is and proud to call her my friend. I asked her last night what she thought about me and my emotional state; she knows me well. She told me I have major PTSD but my emotional strength and knowledge of what I need for myself to be balanced is right on….and I agree.
I am thankful I have been able to stay sober and strong. I have weak days but they don’t take me out like they did when I drank and was on meds.
It feels so good to write and connect with those who understand. Thank you for reading friends.